Reverb10.31 - Core Story

December 31 – Core Story

What central story is at the core of you, and how do you share it with the world? Bonus: Consider your reflections from this month. Look through them to discover a thread you may not have noticed until today. (Author: Molly O’Neill)

The center of my core story is being beautifully imperfect. I can not count the number of times that this notion has been brought to my attention since I started this blog. The idea of being imperfect and it's ok seems to be my theme. The let go of the need to be what I think I 'should be' and just be me.


This article by Susannah Conway called "Allowing Dreams" says it well - to 'let go of some expectations – of what my life should be looking like by now, of what i am capable of doing, of who i could be...start to embrace what is, and that includes giving my dreams more space to breathe".

Sometimes we don't believe we are worthy of receiving what we dream of; sometimes we don't believe it could ever happen. Sometimes we are so convinced of our apparent unworthiness we do everything we can to prevent the good stuff entering our lives. We don't do this consciously, of course. I'm slowly learning that all i need to do to help the good stuff manifest is to step out the way, to stop littering the path with my worries and insecurities, and all the endless head-chatter that scares the dream whisps away. In some ways it's easier to sabotage our dreams than help them become reality – that way, when they don't happen we can shrug our shoulders and say, 'see? I knew it. I'm not worth it.' But lately i've been trying this idea on for size: what if i AM worthy? What if it is okay for good things to come into my life?

There was a part of me that assumed life would be easier once i survived the grief – that i'd embrace a new life-is-short credo and let go of all my fears, gliding through life feeling the power of survival under my wings. But that didn't happen. Life still felt as difficult as ever, if not more so. But today I realised that i've reached a place where i've let go of some expectations – of what my life should be looking like by now, of what i am capable of doing, of who i could be. I'm starting to embrace what is, and that includes giving my dreams more space to breathe.

I always thought i'd be married with kids by now, that i'd be more successful by now, and more established blah blah blah. What i'm starting to grasp is that this is it – this is my life – so why not have some fun with it? View it as a malleable batch of bread dough and see what shapes i can create. Because no one else is going to do it for me, and, heck, maybe some good stuff will happen. This weekend I made a good start on my book proposal, and in doing so i drop-kicked the whiny but-who-do-i-think-i-am-to-write-a-book out of my third-floor window (if you stand on my street this evening you'll see it gasping its last breaths on the pavement before it fades away forever. Good riddance!)

My part of the deal is to work hard, be committed and have a little faith. And to make room in my life for the good stuff to flow. We are allowed to have our dreams, big and small and everything in between. Think of them like your children, to be protected and nurtured, believed in and encouraged – and when the time is right, you need only get out of their way so they can stretch their wings and fly.

Susannah's site & wallpaper: http://www.susannahconway.com/2009/11/allowing-dreams/

Reverb10.29 - Defining Moment

December 29 – Defining Moment

Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year. (Author: Kathryn Fitzmaurice)

I would have to say it would be a series of events that affected my life this year. This quote says it all for me...

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” – M. Scott Peck

This year made me look at myself & my life and make some different choices.

Reverb10.28 - Achieve

December 28 – Achieve

What’s the thing you most want to achieve next year? How do you imagine you’ll feel when you get it? Free? Happy? Complete? Blissful? Write that feeling down. Then, brainstorm 10 things you can do, or 10 new thoughts you can think, in order to experience that feeling today. (Author: Tara Sophia Mohr)

Reverb 10.27 - Ordinary Joy

December 27 – Ordinary Joy

Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year? (Author: Brené Brown)

One of the most simple, ordinary pleasures of this year was one of my co-workers bringing me in fresh, beauuuuutiful flowers each week from his garden. It just made my heart smile.

Here are some pictures of the flowers...

If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change. ~ Buddha

Revert10.26 - Food

December 26 – Soul Food

What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul? (Author: Elise Marie Collins)

I love enjoying a meal with friends & family - sitting at a table, a nice glass of wine and enjoying the company that is with you...the best.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. ~ W. C. Fields

Revert10.25 - Photo

December 25 – Photo – a present to yourself

Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you. (Author: Tracey Clark)

This photo, I feel, captures me the best because I love to laugh :-)
It was shot by someone random outside the restaurant. I had meet up with three others girls from high school. We had a great time reminiscing. It was great to hear everyone's stories and to see how easily we all reconnected. Just an overall great time!!

In 2011...more laughing!

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. ~e.e. cummings

Revert10.24 - Everything's OK

December 24 Prompt – Everything’s OK

What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead? (Author: Kate Inglis)

I can't think of a specific moment, but I do know what my spirituality has always been what has made me realize everything is going to be ok. In times that are challenging, I always trust in my faith.

In 2011, I want rely my spirituality daily, such as gratitude, and live it daily - not 'come back' to it in times of need. Live wholeheartedly.


Photo: http://micasadearte.typepad.com/mi_casa_de_arte/

How to create your personal manifesto:
http://www.gwenbell.com/blog/2009/9/2/how-to-create-your-personal-manifesto.html

Reverb10.23 - New Name

December 23 – New Name

Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?(Author: Becca Wilcott)

I have a nickname that I l.o.v.e. - it's Sam. Some people who have known me for a long time and a few people who I've told my nickname use it. When I was around 24, a man that I worked with said I didn't look like a 'Sandy', I looked more like a 'Samantha'. Well, he started called me Samantha, which turned into Sammy, then Sam. I don't know...I think he was right - it is more me. I love girls names that are boys names. I also think as much as I love being girly - dressing up, wearing heels - I have also love sports and being competitive. I also enjoy hanging around the guys.

I guess I should just start introducing myself as Sam? I had a friend who changed her name to one she liked more. So, why not?

Reverb10.22 - Travel

December 22 – Travel

How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt)

This year I did not do any traveling, per se. Traveling to me would be to plan a destination that you have wanted to visit and experience. I did travel to visit friends and up north, but no trips specific venturing to a new place. It has been six years since I've taken a real vacation. I know after that vacation I felt renewed. By taking the time for myself to relax and get away from the everyday - it was transforming.

Here is a picture from my trip to Puerto Vallarta...

In 2011, I would like to travel to at least one place that I have been longing to see. I don't know where at this point, but, just one...then build from there.

Revert10.21 - Future Self

December 21 – Future Self.

Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?) (Author: Jenny Blake)

I love this question. I’m not going to post my letters online, but I think a lot of things that I would tell myself five years from now would be some of the same things that I would tell myself 10 years ago. This concerns me!

For 2011…let go. Let go of the need to be ‘perfect’…be you - the one of a kind, only one of you in all of time, unique you.

"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. ... No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others" ~ Martha Graham

“There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.” ~ Anthony Rapp

"What people in the world think of you is really none of your business." ~ Martha Graham

Reverb10.20 - Avoidance

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance.

What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)

Let my true feelings be known – the rejection factor scares the crap out of me! Just plain fear. I know in my head that I’ve faced more challenging obstacles and persevered, or worst case…survived it. Why is this so debilitating to me?

For 2011, will I do it? Yes…yes I can, yes I can, yes I can.

Reverb10.19 - Healing

December 19 – Healing.

What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)

My healing this year started out as turmoil. I believe that sometimes it takes complete chaos to ‘wake you up’ and this is what happened to me this year. It was most definitely a drip-by-drip evolution.

This year started out with me stressed, worried and feeling hopeless. It seemed everything I had worked so hard for was spiraling out of control. I prayed and prayed for direction. I felt that many things were just out of my control at this point. So, I asked myself “What is something you can control in your life right now? What would make you feel better?” I decided I could go to the pilates class that I used to attend at my gym. I knew the instructor was awesome and it would make a difference. I didn’t beat myself up about making every single class…I just did the best I could do. I watched what I ate, but wasn’t “perfect” about it. If I was craving a cheeseburger, I would treat myself now and then.

I can say this worked for me! I continue to go to my pilates class – and have a love/hate relationship with it, but more love! I started going to yoga a couple times a week too. This one positive step in the right direction has made a tremendous change in my life. I feel better mentally & physically and am inspired to keep going.

Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn't you - all of the expectations, all of the beliefs - and becoming who you are. ~ Rachel Naomi Remen

For 2011, how would I like to be healed? I would like to see my life from a fresh perspective...not base my 'judgments' of situations & people on what has happened in the past. I want to be able to help others – to be an inspiration somehow. I want my life to be stable enough that I can return to others what I have been given. I feel blessed. I want to bless others.

Reverb10.18 - Try

December 18 – Try.

What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? (Author: Kaileen Elise)

Last year, I got back into working out and it made a huge difference in my life. I feel so much better physically & mentally. Working out definitely improves my physical body, but it is also a great release for me mentally, as well. It’s a life saver, in more ways than one.

In 2011, I want to continue pilates & yoga and continue working on my overall wellness – inside & out. My goal is to add a cardio class...I want to try the spinning class at my gym, or find a kickboxing class I really enjoy. Something I'm really going to love (ok...maybe, love/hate :) so I will stick to it.

I want to become more aware of my eating habits and be more conscious of eating healthy. I would like to try incorporating a lot more meatless meals and fish - a lot more veggies. I've really been wanting to try making black bean burgers. It may be a little challenging way of eating, but worth it.

I want to incorporate a more wholehearted approach to living. I want to amp up my creativity. I want to fully live this life...not be a bystander.

Reverb10.17 - Lesson Learned

December 17 – Lesson Learned.

What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? (Author: Tara Weaver)

I am beautifully imperfect…and that IS perfect!



In 2011, I will continue to choose love. I will do things I fear and live with courage. I will love wholeheartedly.

I just love Brene Brown's work - check out her site by clicking the badge above.

Reverb10.16 - Friendship

December 16 – Friendship.

How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst? (Author: Martha Mihalick)

I think each of my friends bring a different perspective of life into my world. I can’t think of one particular way that one friend has changed me – it’s a compilation of all of them. I believe the saying that people come into your life for a reason, season or a lifetime.

Here is the poem...

Reason, Season, or Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

— Unknown

Reverb10.15 - Five Minutes

December 15 – 5 Minutes.

Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. (Author: Patti Digh)

I want to remember each time my children hugged me and said ‘I love you’. I want to remember each time my children laughed and smiled. I want to remember each time I said ‘I love you’, each time I laughed, smiled, cried happy tears, was in awe, was proud of myself or others, thought happy thoughts, hugged, kissed, felt loved, gave love and when my heart skipped beat in joy.

Reverb10.14 - Appreciate

December 14 – Appreciate.

What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? (Author: Victoria Klein)

I believe I have come to appreciate ‘here & now’. I have been trying to make myself more aware of when I’m worrying about the past or the future and remind myself to be thankful for now. Now is ok. Don’t think about what ‘might be’ or ‘has been’. I express gratitude for it by appreciating what ‘is’ and all the blessings in my life by saying thank you to God and writing gratitude lists.

Reverb10.13 - Action

December 13 – Action.

When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)

I have to agree with Scott Belsky's book, "Making Ideas Happen" - ideas are easy...implementing them is hard!! I know I come up with an idea then feel like I need to have everything in perfect order before I begin...which, often, doesn't happen because I get wrapped up in the details.

One of my goals for 2011 is to take workshops to learn more techiques for my art. My next goal is to actually sell a piece of art in 2011.

I already know the workshop I want to start in January. My next step - sign up!

Reverb10.12 - Body Integration

December 12 – Body Integration.

This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)

I would have to say the times when I feel most integrated with my body - when there is just ME - is when I'm creating art or designing. I tend to loose myself in the moment and all thoughts of anything outside of me are non-existent. Creativity is when I feel most connected with my soul.

A floor plan I created...
Another art project...

“Creativity is inventing, experimenting, growing, taking risks, breaking rules, making mistakes, and having fun.” — Mary Lou Cook

Reverb10.11 - Eleven Things

December 11 – 11 Things.

What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

1. Negativity
2. Worry
3. Fear
4. Clutter
5. Outdated Beliefs
6. Walls
7. Drama
8. Dwelling on the past
9. Playing small
10. Waiting until its 'perfect'
11. Excuses

In 2011, I will begin spending more time with uplifting people who make me want to be more. I will work on letting go & letting God when worry and fear try to take over. I will re-organize my filing system so every document has a place and get rid of things I no longer need or use. I will work on replacing any old beliefs that no longer serve me with heart felt beliefs and resonate with my soul. I will let down my walls that I have built to “protect” myself and let love in. Take the first step & begin...just begin! I will dream BIG and believe even bigger! I will quit making excuses for why I don't do something and look for the real reason why or why not. I will recognize when I'm basing 'what is' on 'what was' and see the situation or person with different eyes.

There are certain people who bring out the best in you. Just being around them raises your game, makes you a better version of yourself. Let go of those who
whittle you down, little by little, to fit you into their smaller experience of the world. ~ Karina Allrich

As Albert Eistein devised…

“We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.”

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

By releasing, eliminating & replacing these 11 things – I would feel liberated - open to endless possibilities!